Stare Into Space

The stuff of nightmares

Posted on | November 25, 2008 | Comments Off on The stuff of nightmares

My daughter owns a weird, decapitated head.  Its purpose is to provide a blank canvas for all sorts of girlie make-up application practices. It has played this part for the last year or so and has worn many a combination of maquillage although, as a manly man, I am unsure of the exact classification of these cosmetics.

The head, eerie and frightening enough on a normal day, recently received an application of face paints (the ones used to make kids look like tigers at fairs).  Daughter sat happily and carefully applied paints as I rustled up a nice Guinness and beef pie.  When she’d finished, she called me over for a look.

Gaah!  I mean, that’s beautiful.  Wow, she looks great.  Well done.  I, erm, have to check the dinner.

I backed away slowly, muttering prayers to the god I don’t believe exists.

Brilliant, honey.  Now, you clean dolly’s face and call me when it’s done.  Not before, ok.  When it’s all clean.

With closed eyes, I took a picture on my phone to prove it was real.

I see this in my nightmares.

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Gerry Hayes

Gerry Hayes

I mostly sit around all day and drink tea. Occasionally, I write stuff and send it to strangers so they can humiliate me and deride my efforts. Other than the self-harm to dull the shame of failure, it's not a bad life. Like I say, there's tea.

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