Stare Into Space

About Me

I used to write stuff and send it to strangers so they could scoff at my efforts. Now I mostly just drink tea while considering minor past glories.


In the prehistory of our species, my work has appeared on (or in):

  • The Whale In The Room – 10 x 10min play – Resonance FM (co-writer)
  • The Man-Eating Beast Of Wimbledon Common – Dominic Stinton directed short film (contributor)
  • On The Case – Short film (Writer)
  • Recorded For Training Purposes – BBC Radio 4

My prose-type stuff has been here:

Also, I have managed to blag my way into the following:

  • Red Planet Prize 2008 – Finalist
  • Movie Mogul Fund 2008 – Finalist
  • British Short Screenplay Competition 2009 – Quarter Finalist
  • British Short Screenplay Competition 2008 – Quarter Finalist
  • Rouge Wave Short Scene Competition – Winner

Somehow, too, I succeeded in duping the BBC into inviting me to their BBC Comedy Writing Workshop a couple of years back. This is mainly useful for dropping, “Oh, yes, well when I was at the Beeb…” into coversation.

And I wrote a bundle of articles for this place before missing a deadline because of an emergency and then forgetting to email to apologise until it reached the point where I was far to embarrassed to ever email again:

  • Flickering Myth – Movie Blog and home of (among other things) my movie-rant archive where I mainly just bitch about films.

Gerry Hayes

Gerry Hayes

I mostly sit around all day and drink tea. Occasionally, I write stuff and send it to strangers so they can humiliate me and deride my efforts. Other than the self-harm to dull the shame of failure, it's not a bad life. Like I say, there's tea.

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  • The Twitter

    • WHYYYYYYY?! *falls to knees beseeching the cosmos*
    • Proper scientists tell us the most pissed off you get, the more you want to eat all the cakes. Christ, I want cake.
    • Everybody finds Caravaggios but me. Where's my bloody Caravaggio? Lost 'Caravaggio' painting found in French attic
    • No, honestly… I’m not an arsehole.
    • Go help @Herring1967 disrupt industries and smash systems at What an age we live in. Go. Now.
    • I find Tattoo Fixers utterly compelling viewing.
    • Peppa Pig’s vile Animal Caste System continues to disgust me. Condemn this mammal-centric regime!
    • Frequently wonder what the point of democracy is. Looking forward to the day I can seize power and oversee my Mostly Benevolent Dictatorship
    • Dude… Check it out. I totally swiped his helmet.
    • I’ve been watching this Disclosure movie. This “virtual reality” thing seems to be the future. I may invest.
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