Stare Into Space

Meet the new blog, same as the old blog

It’s new and yet it’s not… Well, it is… Kind of. Welcome to Stare Into Space. All new domain name.  All new, and completely original, look (see how it sparkles).  Same old dull content.  I am style above substance; form above function.  I am the lipstick on the pig. Basically, my old blog was of [...]

Par-rump-a-pum-pum

Time once again to celebrate the feast of the Christus, or the birth of Cliff Richard, or whatever it is that forces us to spend daft money on daft gifts for daft friends and relatives.  I’m planning the traditional Christmas of gorging myself on carbohydrates and dead birds (and the flesh of miscellaneous other animals), [...]

Woman-Flu

Very little sleep last night.  Wife and daughter have colds.  Daughter not too bad but wife ‘at death’s door’ apparently. Last night she woke up and started groping noisily around her bedside locker for Strepsils.  She found them eventually and rattled the rattly blister-pack trying to get one out, eventually succeeding.  Then she dropped the [...]

B-U-S-T-E-D

Last night, my daughter, now four, asked me, “why do you and mum sometimes talk with letters and not words?” The jig’s up.  She might not be able to spell, but she knows that something’s going on and gets all watchful and sneaky. A new system is required.  I’m for Pig-Latin. Afty-cray ittle-lay rat-bay.  Ix-nay [...]

Handy, bite-sized chunks

I haven’t posted in a week.  This is, in large part, due to the fact that I quite like having my good news post on the top of the list for any visitors to see (as I strongly suspect that many of you are far to lazy to actually scroll down to see if there [...]

Gerry Hayes

Gerry Hayes

I mostly sit around all day and drink tea. Occasionally, I write stuff and send it to strangers so they can humiliate me and debase my efforts. Other than the self-harm to dull the shame of failure, it's not a bad life. Like I say, there's tea.

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    • Effectively, Bear Grylls has made a career of exaggerating stuff and eating crap that scuttles. He'd clean up on I'm A Celebrity.
    • I do love Bear Grylls' ridiculous hyperbole: "Anyone who underestimates this Death Chasm, will be dead!" It's a bloody kerb, Bear.
    • You don't get much Dave Dee, Dozy, Beaky, Mick & Tich these days. It's all Justin Bieber Feat. Child-Friendly lyrics of Katy Perry now.
    • It was a lot of crisps, to be fair. I feel a little unwell.
    • A 150g bag of salt & vinegar crisps is too much to eat in one sitting, right? Even with beer.
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