Stare Into Space

Galileo, Figaro, magnifico

As my wife popped off with the progeny this weekend to visit her folks, I had, what is colloquially termed in these parts, a free gaff. Decided to get The Brother over for a visit and perhaps a drinkie or two. Picked him up and headed to the off-licence for some beers. We bought a [...]

Terrible Twos

It appears that my daughter has well and truly found The Terrible Twos and made them her own. On Monday night, I came home about an hour after my darling daughter’s bedtime and opened the front door to much wailing and screaming. I popped upstairs to see what the fuss was and found my wife [...]

Ahhh, me finger

Cryptic title I know, but all will become clear. Yesterday, I took delivery of a consignment of manly power-tools. All men love power-tools (all men that I know anyway). I believe it’s the atavistic urge to do things with tools combined with the geeky pleasure that this particular tool has a plug on it and [...]

Gerry Hayes

Gerry Hayes

I mostly sit around all day and drink tea. Occasionally, I write stuff and send it to strangers so they can humiliate me and debase my efforts. Other than the self-harm to dull the shame of failure, it's not a bad life. Like I say, there's tea.

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    • Effectively, Bear Grylls has made a career of exaggerating stuff and eating crap that scuttles. He'd clean up on I'm A Celebrity.
    • I do love Bear Grylls' ridiculous hyperbole: "Anyone who underestimates this Death Chasm, will be dead!" It's a bloody kerb, Bear.
    • You don't get much Dave Dee, Dozy, Beaky, Mick & Tich these days. It's all Justin Bieber Feat. Child-Friendly lyrics of Katy Perry now.
    • It was a lot of crisps, to be fair. I feel a little unwell.
    • A 150g bag of salt & vinegar crisps is too much to eat in one sitting, right? Even with beer.
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